


Tales From The Council: Chapter One

by siltscribe



Category: Rover Red: Alone in Apocalypse (Podcast)
Genre: Gen, Talesfromthecouncil
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-24
Updated: 2017-08-24
Packaged: 2018-12-19 11:08:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,537
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11896482
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/siltscribe/pseuds/siltscribe
Summary: A typical day in the life of the Rover Council.The Council is a very professional organization. And, the Council members who make up Upper Management no doubt reflect that professionalism.... right?





	Tales From The Council: Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> None of the stories, save for the beginning (this one) and the end need to be read in any certain order.
> 
> Otherwise, have fun, and we hope you enjoy! 
> 
> #talesfromthecouncil

“Silting late again. Son of a binch.”

Tina cursed, mumbling to herself, as she pushed through the door of the cafe, nodding at a couple that were entering. Normally she would have stopped to chat, but her work day had started fifteen minutes ago.

She rushed down the hallway balancing a tray of drinks from the cafe. Being late was almost always smoothed over with coffee or donuts. But… the cafe had been out of donuts this morning. And a bunch of other things, it seemed like. She didn't get a chance to talk to Jason about it; he'd been busy with a small, very vocal, and very agitated group of Council members. So she'd taken the drinks, and ran.

Literally.

Not that there was much to do today, with everyone preparing for the Council meeting tomorrow. This was an off week, so while there wasn't a vote today, ballot options were being presented, and some members happened to be a little long winded. Not to mention that sometimes these debates could spiral into … well, more than debates. Last month something related to the Dedlif soldiers had come  
up, and Sprocket and Taz had almost come to blows. They got on well most days, but they definitely had some conflicting views when the military came into play.

Stepping into the elevator, she nodded a greeting at Cerberus, the Council’s resident lift attendant.

“You’re late. Your office?”

Tina rolled her eyes, before nodding approval.“Yeah. Late. You'd think that living where you work would help keep that from happening, but. Here we are. “

He shrugged, failing to hide a smirk as he pressed the button for the sixth floor. “You'd think. Anyway, music while we ride? Any song you'd like.”

“No. Absolutely not. I have heard enough Gmcfosho for a lifetime.”

The answer was short and clipped as she handed him and the third head a coffee, nodding apologetically at the middle one.

“No tea, I'm sorry. I don't think Jason made an order this week? Or maybe he just ordered all the wrong things? I don't really know…”

“It's fine. And thank you, for not falling for his nonsense. If I have to hear that song one more time..”

Tina smiled, a sympathetic look on her face. “I completely understand. Sid’s on the same kick. Gee, I wonder who's fault _that_ could be….”

Cerberus’ first head scoffed, shaking itself emphatically. “Whatever. You just need better taste in music.”

“And _he's_ just cranky he can't work out. Someone stole our dumbbells yesterday morning.”

Head 3, who looked like she'd woken up solely to insert her opinion, stuck her tongue out at Head 1, and it looked like he was about to volley back, when the elevator stopped at her floor.

“Oh thank Speaker. Bye Cerberus! I… I'll see what I can do about finding those dumbbells…” Tina yelled over her shoulder , sprinting down the hall,mentally chastising herself for yet again forgetting their names. I mean, she couldn't keep calling them Cerberus, no matter what their nametag said.

But she'd left her quarters entirely too late, and work without coffee wasn't even close to an option.

Even if said coffee seemed to be loaded with extra cinnamon, as these cups seemed to be. _Thank you, Jason_ , she thought, rolling her eyes slightly.

Not that the cinnamon was bad, per se. She certainly didn't mind it. It was more Sid’s reaction she wasn't excited for.

Not that Sid disliked cinnamon… well, Tina honestly didn't know Sid’s thoughts on cinnamon. Which was odd considering the number of rants she'd been on the listening end up, but that was a different thing entirely. It wasn't even the cinnamon that concerned her.

It was more the ongoing rivalry between the two that seemed to escalate daily. And the tampering with the coffee was never taken lightly.

The hallway ended at a small lobby, with a welcome desk at the center. The walls were covered in portraits of elders, and various Council members. Behind the welcome desk was a framed recreation of the Rover sigil, and next to that, a portrait of Speaker Prime.

The coffees sloshed as she plopped them down on the welcome desk in front of the bubbly woman on the phone. Erika, the Council’s secretary, motioned to the phone and rolled her eyes before making grabby hands for the iced chai sitting beside the two French press coffees.  
  
“Cayenne?” Erika mouthed, jutting her chin toward the remaining drinks.

“Nope. Cinnamon this time.”

“Thank god.” Erika said, slamming the receiver down.

“Speak for yourself, I kinda liked it. And I got double the coffee that week.”

“Yeah, well, some of us can't even have single coffees. So..”

“Don't look at me. I'm not the one who got you pregnant.”

Erika chuckled, glancing down at her stomach. “Luckily enough for you. I can't imagine Sasha would be too thrilled with us working together if that were the case.”

“Ha. Yeah. Except she'd kill us all anyway, if she knew you weren’t home resting comfortably in bed noshing bon-bons… Where'd she find those again?”

Acting offended, Erika slammed her cup on the desk and narrowed her eyes. “Excuse you, they are _truffles_ , and they were imported from Death. And if you believe Sasha, they were blessed by a Wytch from a high ranking family.”

Tina stuck her tongue out. “Gracious. Truffles. A thousand apologies. And  
frankly… I believe it. Let's be real. She probably threatened to kill him if he _didn't_ bless them. Also? Low key offended you aren't sharing..”

Wide-eyed, the pregnant woman shook her head, feigning distress. “No! How could I? I mean, how many Wytches’ lives are you willing to risk?!”

The women exchanged conspiratorial glances before they were interrupted by a series of loud bangs and crashes coming from the corner office.

Erika winced, but before she could open her mouth...

“Don't ask, I don't know. And in your case? Plausible deniability is always better.”

\--  
Tina pushed her way through the office door, and set the coffees down on her desk.

“Sid…? Everything okay??”

She walked over to the wall that separated their offices, and peered through the hole that was about waist level.

“Mother silter. No, no it's not okay. That silteater did it again. I swear on the Speaker that-- ooooh! Found my chips. _Yeeee!_ ”

Doing her best not to laugh at the abrupt subject change, Tina grabbed the coffee off the table and walked back to the hole, extending her arm through.

“Bless.” Sid popped off their desk, swiped the coffee, and dropped a single chip in her hand. “Sweet potato. These are the _shit_. Now, can you please stick your head in so I can talk to you properly?  
  
“Of course. Because doors are overrated.”

“Damn right they are.”

Naturally. It wasn't that the request surprised her, far from it. Weird and bizarre were definitely par for the course around here. She was half convinced her coworkers’ …. _eccentricities_ were the reason she'd been hired in the first place.

Extremely thankful she hadn't picked today to wear a dress, she knelt down, and started to go through the hole into her neighbor's office. She made it halfway through before she had to stop.

What a sight.

Papers were everywhere.

All sorts of papers. Official Council paperwork, some shiny blue letterhead, random scrawlings of who _knows_ what, intermingled with brightly colored post it notes with phrases she would rather not repeat. Atop the desk where she'd expect the paperwork to be, sat a pair of combat boots, an old Rover blade, a small shiny coin, and what looked to be bits and pieces of a tool kit.

Sid was seated on the floor in the midst of the chaos, chugging the coffee like their life depended on it. Halfway through, Sid slammed the cup down, and made a retching noise.

“Ah. Yeah… about that. Jason--”

“Silter’s getting weak. _Cinnamon??_ Pshh. Would have thought he'd go the sour route, after the cayenne backfired.” Sid made a face, clearly not looking forward to finishing the chalky drink.

“Yeah yeah. It's not your fault I actually liked that hellacious drink. Really, now that we're on the subject, I'd be more than happy to finish this one off for you too.” What she didn't mention, was that she'd left her full cup of coffee on her desk in her own office. She hadn't even taken a drink before trying to crawl through this sorry excuse for a passageway.

“Absolutely not. It doesn't matter if I like it or not. It's about dominance. A moment, please.”

Sid nudged some papers aside, and fished out their lightscreen.  
After tapping the screen a few times, Sid handed it to Tina, indicating she should aim it at them. After a few seconds, Sid went into action.

Wordlessly, they picked the coffee cup, and brought it to their lips. Slowly, defiantly, they drank every drop, never removing their eyes from the screen.

As Sid finished the coffee, they slowly approached the lightscreen, until their nose was practically pressed against the screen. After sitting there for a few minutes, Sid started talking, their voice dripping with disdain.

“Thanks for the coffee, _friend_. I’ll take another if you don't mind. While you're at it…” And then Sid pressed their nose- well, their entire face against the lightscreen, in a move that would have knocked Tina over if she hadn't been firmly stuck in the wall. “GIVE ME MY HAMMER BACK YOU WALNUT. Or I swear to the Speaker, I'll vo--”

“Oookay, and send.” Tina tapped the send button before Sid could finish.  
She knew what the next part of the sentence would be, and had zero desire to become part of the Vore War.  
Not that they were calling it that. That's what Cara from HR had taken to calling it. No one had complained yet, but she thought it best to keep tabs on the situation, in case it spiraled out of control.

“Really? You couldn't just let me say it? Just this once?” They sounded annoyed, but headed back towards the chips on the desk.

“Nope. Do that silt on your own time. Besides…. shouldn't you be prepping for the session tomorrow?”

Sid popped another chip in their mouth before answering. “Session? Why? Oh, chip?” Before she could answer, they lobbed a chip her way, missing her mouth cleanly, but making a solid connection with her forehead.

“HEY! Mouth’s down here, thanks. Also? Yeah… the Rover Council session? Leah? You know.. kinda a big deal…. Aren’t you presenting a ballot option?”

Sid scoffed, walking back over to where Tina was still laying half in their office, and half in her own. They held a chip up to her lips, and when she opened her mouth, tossed it in before patting her head.

“Nah. I got this. It's no contest. Remember, after all- I'm da bes.” After striking a little pose and doing a mock victory dance, Sid froze, a look of panic across their face.

“What?”

“Silt. I forgot to feed Cerberus!! Oh son of a -”

They cut themselves off, dropped the chips on the desk and started searching for keys.

“Oh, Speaker. You didn't.”

Sid didn't answer, but flipped her off instead, still looking for keys.

Tina sighed, pointing to the key hook on the back of the office door.

“There. What's dinner?”

Sid grinned, grabbing the keys.

“Triple decker sandwiches. With cottage cheese.” Sid made a face, then cackled at their own joke. “Anyway. I have to go, man I am so late. I'll be RIGHT back.”

Sid dashed out the door and headed towards the elevator, letting the door swing on its hinges.

“Wonderful. I guess I'll just….. hang out here.”

Tina kicked her shoes off, maybe with a little more force than needed, grimacing a little as she heard one connect with her own door. This was not exactly how she'd planned on spending the day. Especially with the Council vote coming up. There were notes to take, and at least four other members she wanted to meet with before the end of the day.

Fantastic.

Although…

Sid’s lightscreen was just right there.

She reached for it, but it was just out of reach. Her fingers connected with some sticky notes, but not well enough to drag the device closer.

“Silt.”

She wriggled some more. It was only an inch away. Surely she could get that much extra room? Holding her breath, she braced her feet against the floor in her office, getting ready to push. She hardly noticed the blue shoes that showed up in front of her, as someone nudged the lightscreen out of the way.

“No! Damn it, I almost had -- oh!”

Her voice softened when she saw the owner of the shoes. Erika had been watching the commotion, and once it had lost it's entertainment value, slipped into Tina’s office and retrieved the still slightly warm coffee. And had helpfully stuck a straw in it.

Tina waited as patiently as she could while the other woman slid the desk chair over she she didn't have to kneel on the floor. She was far enough along in her pregnancy that the floor was no longer a viable option for sitting.

After several long sips of coffee, Tina exhaled in what was _mostly_ mock relief, and waited while Erika set the cup down on the desk behind her.

“By Speaker, you're a saint. Any chance you've got a crowbar or something hidden up your sleeve?”

Erika shook her head sadly, clicking her tongue.

“Nope. Sure don't. I should though, considering the jams you all find yourself in.” She glanced around the room, making a face at the state of it. “Doesn't Sid have a hammer or something around here?”

Tina groaned, covering her face in her hands. _The hammer_. Of course. Those two would eventually be the death of her. Or, someone else. It was hard to say, really.  
  
“Nope. Silt.”

Erika rolled her eyes, and went for the coffee again. Holding it out again, she shook her head. “Jason?”

Tina nodded, speaking around the straw in her mouth. “Who else?” After a few more sips, she sighed, and mixed waving a white flag. “Might as well quit stalling and have E.V.i.E. page Jason. Even if he doesn't have Sid’s hammer, he'll have something that should get me out of here.”

Tina closed her eyes and put her fingers to her temples, trying to remember those breathing exercises she'd learned. A few quick taps of the lightscreen, and Erika announced it was done.

“You, ah, think Sid would mind if I tidied up a bit?”

Tina started to shake her head no, but thought better of it. Sid likely wouldn't love it, but Sid had left her stuck in a wall while off feeding their latest pet project.

“Know what? Knock yourself out.”

Erika clapped her hands in celebration, and popped Tina's coffee back in her hands. Glancing around the room, she thought for a minute, then started flitting around the room, stacking and sorting, humming to herself, leaving Tina to lay there awkwardly sipping her coffee, praying Cerberus kept Sid sidetracked for the foreseeable future . 

 

 


End file.
